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		<title>Todd Davis : My Response to thinkb4youspeak&#8217;s campaign of hate.</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2011/06/09/todd-davis-my-response-to-thinkb4youspeaks-campaign-of-hate/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2011/06/09/todd-davis-my-response-to-thinkb4youspeaks-campaign-of-hate/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 09 Jun 2011 22:17:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[Your television campaign, though well intentioned, is just as lazy a move as the laziness exhibited by the people who carelessly use inappropriate language. And that is what&#8217;s offensive. When I use words, I mean them, but I am finding, more and more, that words don&#8217;t mean much to a growing number of Americans. Fortunately, [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=251&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Your television campaign, though well intentioned, is just as lazy a move as the laziness exhibited by the people who carelessly use inappropriate language.</p>
<p>And that is what&#8217;s offensive.  When I use words, I mean them, but I am finding, more and more, that words don&#8217;t mean much to a growing number of Americans.</p>
<p>Fortunately, your campaign is not directed at me.  But since your ads are on tv, easily accessible by the public, I have to suffer through them.  The people being so offensive, probably watch alot of tv, so you think tv is a good venue for your work.  you also believe that the proper way to address the lazy, careless, speech is with some lazy careless speech of your own and if it will end the use of offensive language than you believe you will have done some kind of good and just as you are bullying the kids who thoughtlessly use offensive language, bullies are still terrorizing kids in grade schools.  The only reason kids use offensive language is because they feel like being offensive.  If you want to do something positive, get them at school where they expect to learn something that will not try to sell them something else to go along with it.  Do it soon while there is still a chance that commercialism has not corrupted education, completely.</p>
<p>The use of offensive language is offensive.  If you want to encourage anyone who hears it to attack the offenders, be prepared to face the consequences.  Americans have a right to free speech.  That may be a hate crime I just committed right there, and I am sorry.  I am even sorrier that saying a thing like Americans have a right to free speech is offensive to so many people, but I don&#8217;t mean it in the offensive way that it is so often used.  I mean it in the way it was meant to be meant.  Free Speech has always been intended to mean the free expression of ideas without having to worry about being jumped by an angry mob and its intention was to make sure no great idea went unspoken because someone was afraid it might offend the government.  It is probably human nature, or more accurately, human weakness to try and personalize such noble concepts as the guarantee of free speech, but the humble citizens of America are as prone to human weakness as any.  Another thing they are prone to do is as little as possible.  Laziness.  Another thing they are prone to do is throw money at a problem if they have the budget for it.  Another thing American people are prone to do is to get on tv if they can.  Censorship is another thing a lazy American is prone to do when they hear something that offends.</p>
<p>Free Speech takes work.  There are things a child should never hear, but if you take a child where they are likely to hear offensive language, that responsibility is yours.  A parent still has the brunt of the responsibility when it comes to ensuring a child gets the full benefit of their guarantee of free speech.  A parent should be offended when a child comes home from school with a new offensive word, and it falls on the parent to address the problem of their kid using offensive language.</p>
<p>A television campaign against offensive language should be outraging all the parents who have failed their kids.  Its a bummer for me because thinkb4youspeak thinks they are doing something good or something that will lessen offensive language when it is only because of them that I now hear more offensive language in one commercial break than I usually hear all week.</p>
<p>I hope you end your campaign of intolerance soon. </p>
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		<title>Todd : Conservatives</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2011/02/26/todd-conservatives/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2011/02/26/todd-conservatives/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 26 Feb 2011 07:00:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/?p=215</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[CALLING ALL CONSERVATIVES! most people know what its like to be conservative. anyone who ever had a kid, and anyone who ever had a younger sibling that they ever had to look out for knows what its like to be a conservative. it is of no matter the amount of money that stuff costs, the [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=215&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>CALLING ALL CONSERVATIVES!</p>
<p>most people know what its like to be conservative.  anyone who ever had a kid, and anyone who ever had a younger sibling that they ever had to look out for knows what its like to be a conservative.  it is of no matter the amount of money that stuff costs, the quality of clothes worn and torn, whether the fixtures ripped off the sink were made of steel or of polished brass, or if the speakers that were blown out were klipsch or audiovox, a conservative wishes to preserve, to maintain a level or quality close to the one that was there before the ones that made it possible left and wishes to have it back to the same condition it was in before the ones that made it get back.  a conservative, when its all said and done, aint nothin but a one who doesn&#8217;t want to see anyone hurt, making lots of noise, breaking stuff, making a mess, getting lost, or getting into trouble.</p>
<p>how many parents and older siblings have cringed at the sight of the latest thing broken or ruined by their charges?  those pants that got ruined were not the most expensive there ever was, but they were your favorite and they were irreplaceable and now they are gone forever.  the car that was rolled was not the best car ever, but it was the only car you had and now what are you sposed to do for transportation?  when you get down to the truth about conservatism, it is neither a fear of change, nor is it a desire to have things be better than they were when the conservative got there, but it is a principle guided by a desire to have as little of an impact as possible to maintain a level of quality that existed when the conservative got there.</p>
<p>anyone who ever lamented the loss of a thing at the hands of a child knows what its like to be a conservative and more conservatives are made everyday.  if we do the math, we see that it takes two conservatives-parents, to make a child. if that family remains a one child family, then one child-liberal comes out of that, by the time kid is old enough to leave, broken home.  if, however, the parents make more kids, then the ratio of conservatives to liberals changes, though the home will be battered much worse than if there had been only one kid.  many other factors, like difference in the years separating the older and younger siblings,  sexes of the siblings, and whether alliances have been formed within the ranks of the children, affect the number and severity of conservatives that emerge from the average home, but by and large, the bigger the family, the more a conservative viewpoint has a chance to grow.</p>
<p>as one grapples with conservatism, the answer to the question of the means by which to maintain becomes ever elusive.  a violent environment, created with the use of physical and emotional abuse can be an effective deterrent to change, but a violent environment has a way of stunting the growth of the ones inside it.  another option is to keep the little kiddies so distracted by things shiny, flashy and exciting, they wont have a chance to get bored and start setting the place on fire, but a distracted child does not equal a developed child, so you once again end up stunting the growth of the kiddies.  the ideal situation for the preservation of your world is going to be one that does not stunt the growth of people in the world because if the kiddies get to grow up and acquire the skills necessary to build their own world, they&#8217;ll move in there and not come back to break the stuff in your world.</p>
<p>cycle of life.</p>
<p>so hopefully everyone has had time to remember the losses they have suffered at the sticky hands of a child and with those fresh in their minds, can think of what is happening in this country</p>
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		<title>Todd : Passion</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2011/02/11/todd-passion/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2011/02/11/todd-passion/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 11 Feb 2011 08:04:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/?p=204</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[So a really hot chick, like a head cheerleader and prom queen of the most prestigious high school in the country is on the rag and experiencing symptoms of premenstrual syndrome and she is crying and screaming at someone on the phone when her boyfriend, the lacrosse captain and hockey star with a good gpa [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=204&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>So a really hot chick, like a head cheerleader and prom queen of the most prestigious high school in the country is on the rag and experiencing symptoms of premenstrual syndrome and she is crying and screaming at someone on the phone when her boyfriend, the lacrosse captain and hockey star with a good gpa and a heck of a shot at senior class president, a boy with whom she has an orgasm most times they fool around so she thinks she is in love, walks in and she asks him if he thinks she is too emotional.</p>
<p>Well he likes fooling around with her and he also has an orgasm most times they fool around which is alot and he wants to keep doing that so he harkens back to a conversation his mother and father had when they were going through a rough patch and she was screeching the same question at his father.  What his father said to her was, &#8220;What are you talking about?  Your high energy?  Your passion?&#8221; and he takes her in his arms, like his father did, and he holds her and tells her that her passion is one of her most endearing qualities and so, after they get done fooling around she goes around and tells everyone who has ears she is not too emotional, what she has is high energy, and she&#8217;s passionate.  It&#8217;s like the fat kid who tells everyone he&#8217;s just big boned.  And prolly because she was superfine, everyone listened and a revolution in public relations was started.</p>
<p>A girl being emotional is like fish being wet.  Do we really think we need to encourage the fish to be more wet?  Emotional is not passionate.  And too emotional is out of control.  It is more passionate, &#8216;specially when speaking in public to bite your tongue, to resist excitable shrieks, be they happy shrieks of delight, or bitter angry shrieks of rage.  Having seen a lot of women speaking publicly about a variety of things, I&#8217;m real impressed every time I see one pull it off. </p>
<p>What bums me out is all these men, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bill O&#8217;Reilly, and the like, supposedly conservative men with supposedly conservative philosophies completely out of control when they speak publicly about anything.  Of course the reality is people don&#8217;t want to listen to men who could make a difference, they want to listen to men who have a snappy comeback.  These men aren&#8217;t the problem.  They are businessmen and what they do is just capitalize on exploiting a symptom of what&#8217;s wrong with us.</p>
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		<title>Todd : Kung Fu Grip and Catlike Reflexes at Work</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/07/24/todd-kung-fu-grip-and-catlike-reflexes/</link>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 24 Jul 2009 02:49:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Catlike Reflexes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[industry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kung Fu Grip]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[maturity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[training]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[work]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/?p=115</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It is my belief that once a person emerges from the drama, or trauma of puberty, which may never happen as demonstrated by the Jerry Springer Show and Professional Wrestling being aired on the SyFy channel, of all places, that person will, start to mature. As people mature, they begin to see beyond the pores [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=115&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It is my belief that once a person emerges from the drama, or trauma of puberty, which may never happen as demonstrated by the Jerry Springer Show and Professional Wrestling being aired on the SyFy channel, of all places, that person will, start to mature.  As people mature, they begin to see beyond the pores of their own noses, a world that would love to have them if they would but join it, and they begin to see a place for themselves in the world and begin to participate, wishing to contribute as much as they get out of the world.  These contributing members of society will usually fall into one of two roles as they begin to apply their talents for the big picture, perhaps even, thinking globally and acting locally.  These roles, or modes of operation, can be best described as Kung Fu Grip and Catlike Reflexes.</p>
<p>Yes, just like the old action figures you used to play with as a kid, you can actually develop, upon reaching the age of maturity, Kung Fu Grip!  And let me tell you, Kung Fu Grip is an awesome thing to have.  It is also an awesome quality to look for in a person if you have something very important to do and you need someone else to do it.</p>
<p>Kung Fu Grip is imbued with certain very special qualities.  For one thing, all Kung Fu Grip needs to know to do a thing is how to do it.  Once that person has been trained properly on how to do a thing, the thing will get done exactly as they have been trained to do it.  Kung Fu Grip puts out extremely high quality work and can be a priceless asset for testing training methods.  Also, as issues arise, issues that threaten the production of a thing, like the boss comes by to check on how things are going, or a coworker comes by to shoot the breeze, or maybe a tool required to do the job fails and must be fixed before the job can progress any further, Kung Fu Grip will be able to pick up right where they left off, and continue with the task without any deviation from the original training on how to do the thing.  Lastly, since Kung Fu Grip is on the job, interruptions to the process are dealt with very diplomatically, as concentration is less of a consideration for the completion of a job.  These qualities make for excellent production of quality work.</p>
<p>A person without Kung Fu Grip would not be able to handle interruptions well because without Kung Fu Grip, a person is unable to detach from the process which requires concentration from the beginning of the job until the end.  The best a person without Kung Fu Grip can do is to break the job up into smaller parts, each with a beginning and an end, so if the process is interrupted, that person may be able to pick up where they left off at the end of a small part of the larger process.  Interruptions in the middle of a smaller part of the larger process, like an unexpected phone call, will cause the person lacking Kung Fu Grip great stress until they can get to a good breaking point in the process.  Relationships can become strained if no good breaking point can be reached in a favorable time frame.  Even when the good place to break is reached, upon returning to the process, a person without Kung Fu Grip has to try to remember where they left off so they can get back into the groove of the thing they were doing.  The process of finding the groove can be very difficult and quality is put at risk, and cannot be guaranteed until the precious groove is found and fallen into.</p>
<p>If a person has reached the age of maturity, is less concerned about what they can get out of the world and more concerned about what they can put into it, but does not have the Kung Fu Grip, they must have Catlike Reflexes.  Catlike Reflexes suffers the limitations of not having Kung Fu Grip, but can often mimic Kung Fu Grip by producing the same quality results of Kung Fu Grip.  The thing that drives Catlike Reflexes is the desire to give, and this they do by sheer force of will and knowledge of the quality objective.  Catlike Reflexes does not require good training because they teach themselves as they learn by always asking themselves what the greatest good would be.</p>
<p>Failure on the part of the trainer to establish a clear quality goal, can be disastrous, but an open line of communication will often out poor supervision and traning without having to give up Catlike Reflexes.  Many times, Catlike Reflexes discovers ways to improve processes that may have become obsolete due to the availability of newer or more powerful tools, or they may even develop their own newer, more powerful tools.  By implementing newer or more powerful tools, Catlike Reflexes will be able to churn out a greater quantity of work, but quantity does not always mean quality and Catlike Reflexes knows this, is not concerned with numbers, but is only concerned with a perfect product.  Catlike Reflexes is a researcher and developer and will experiment on the extra products to try to improve them, or implement the change requested by the boss the last time they came by and interupted the process, a process much more easily controlled, stopped, started, and automated by a tool developed by Catlike Reflexes.  The proof is always in the pudding and if the pudding is just as good as that of Kung Fu Grip, so much the better.</p>
<p>Though Kung Fu Grip is super sweet, it would seem that Catlike Reflexes might be a more desirable quality to have if one was in an industry that is always changing and growing.  This is simply not true!  Kung Fu Grip often mimics Catlike Reflexes just like Catlike reflexes often mimics Kung Fu Grip.  The only difference is how you work with them.  If your training method is sound, Kung Fu Grip will easily adjust any process to accommodate a new thing.  Kung Fu Grip can also, and more reliably, detect when an improvement is needed, and develop the needed improvement, implementing it seamlessly into the original process.  Catlike Reflexes requires the clear quality goal in training and an open line of communication.  Each will help to assess your training methods and each will produce high quality results.  The thing that creates Kung Fu Grip and Catlike Reflexes, like toxic waste and various forms of radiation has created so many superheroes, is the thing that gave them their power &#8211; maturity, followed by a desire to give.</p>
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		<title>Todd : Going With the Flow</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/07/19/todd-going-with-the-flow/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/07/19/todd-going-with-the-flow/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 19 Jul 2009 04:14:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[babbling brook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[buoyancy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[density]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[design]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flotsam]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[people]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[If Life is like a babbling brook, whooshing whimsically, over and around water polished rocks pushed up from the bed of the brook, then people would be like the flotsam a dimwitted man would chuck into the brook. If the flotsam chucked was whisked away, bounding and bouncing with the current, the dimwitted man would [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=112&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>If Life is like a babbling brook, whooshing whimsically, over and around water polished rocks pushed up from the bed of the brook, then people would be like the flotsam a dimwitted man would chuck into the brook.  If the flotsam chucked was whisked away, bounding and bouncing with the current, the dimwitted man would squeal with glee.  If, however the flotsam was caught in a swirling pool on the side of the current, unable to catch a wave downstream, the dimwitted man would frown and be moved to try and retrieve the flotsam and urge it into the current.  This, the dimwitted man would do, only to find that each time the flotsam was retrieved and dropped into the current, it would immediately get caught in another swirling pool on the side of the brook.  Now, it stands to reason that if all these things were true, than the point of the brook would be to whisk a piece of flotsam downstream, the point of the flotsam would be to get chucked and get caught up in the current and whisked downstream, and the point of the dimwitted man would be to chuck the flotsam into the brook hoping to be pitched into a fit of glee.</p>
<p>So, if life was like a babbling brook, and people were like flotsam, the dimwitted man would be like a foolish man, picking at random the people he would try to help down the stream.  The foolishness would be illustrated by the man&#8217;s trying to send downstream the same type of flotsam that lacked the density, buoyancy, and design required to be caught by the current and whisked away downstream.  The foolish man usually tries to send downstream, anything handy that had recently given him great pleasure, like a cigarette butt that he had just smoked while he admired the beauty of nature.  The cigarette butt, whose design can be altered simply by shaping it in a foolish man&#8217;s hands, still lacks the density and buoyancy required to be caught by the current, so it immediately finds a pool where it stalls and just sort of circles around the pool.  Lots of people are like the cigarette butts in the hands of a dimwitted man, not ready to be whisked away downstream and reliant upon a dimwitted man to reshape them for another go, only to find themselves stalled in a pool on the side of the current.</p>
<p>But if life was like a babbling brook, and people were like flotsam, the dimwitted man who picked up a random piece of flotsam, chucked it into the current, and squealed with glee as he watched it be immediately whisked away, would also be a foolish man.  The foolishness would be illustrated by the dimwitted man&#8217;s delight in his choosing, at random, a piece of flotsam and wanting to see it be whisked away by the current.  The foolish man usually has his own idea of what success is, and will only accept the accomplishments of another person if those accomplishments match his own ideals regarding success.  The piece of flotsam would then have to be perfect in density, buoyancy, and design so that it would, as easily as could be, be caught up by the current and whisked away.  Lots and lots of people, trying to be perfect, are ashamed of any imperfections they may or may not have, depending on their level of honesty, and strive for perfection by any means necessary, sometimes pointing out the imperfections of others that appear to be a threat to their being whisked away on the current of success.</p>
<p>But if life is like a babbling brook and the people are like flotsam, and the point of life is to whisk away, and the point of flotsam is to be whisked, then who wants a dimwitted man choosing who gets to be caught up by the current?  A child would do a better job than the dimwitted man because the child, too young to smoke wouldn&#8217;t think to throw in a cigarette butt, unless there was one lying around to throw.  Yes, the child would probably try a rock first, but he would immediately move on to something else after seeing the rock sink straight to the bottom.  What would a smart man throw in the brook?  What would an independent woman throw in the brook?  What would an unwashed hippie throw in the brook?  Where do I get off thinking that the brook is static, even though it flows babbling downstream, that the flotsam is static, even though it is representative of people, each of whom are individuals with something something great, but that we, the flotsam should be able to choose who chucks us into the brook?</p>
<p>Because that&#8217;s how life is.  It is like a babbling brook.  And we are like the flotsam chucked into it.  And if we are not buoyant, we will sink and if we are too dense will sink and if we are not dense enough, we will circle the pools on the side of the current, and if our design isn&#8217;t right for sailing, we will sink, or be unable to catch the current.  And if we don&#8217;t choose who chucks us into the brook, it is like having a dimwitted man chuck us in.</p>
<p>By the by, I wanted to write this for a long time, but I dreaded the research I would have to do; chucking various things into the crick by my lair.  And how fun would it have been to imagine the different types of people; their density, design, and buoyancy and what types of objects would be best for floating down the stream.  As it turns out, chucking my cigarette butt is what inspired me to write this a long time ago.  When I finally started, it took a half hour to do.  On a whim, halfway thru this writing, I went to the crick and picked a leaf off a plant right by the crick and dropped it in.  After it was immediately whisked away, and I was done squealing with glee, I noticed there were no leaves on the banks of the crick and I knew who I wanted shaping me, making me ready, and chucking me in.  I chose a long time ago who I wanted.</p>
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		<title>Todd : Desperate Love</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/07/12/todd-desperate-love/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sun, 12 Jul 2009 19:35:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[frustration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[god]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[harry potter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Holy Bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[J.K. Rowling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mythos]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;It&#8217;s not our abilities that make us who we are, but rather, our choices.&#8221; that is a quote from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets movie. The original quote from the book goes, &#8220;It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.&#8221; These quotes are inspirational and [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=107&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8220;It&#8217;s not our abilities that make us who we are, but rather, our choices.&#8221; that is a quote from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets movie.  The original quote from the book goes, &#8220;It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.&#8221;  These quotes are inspirational and thought-provoking to me.</p>
<p>The Harry Potter saga, created by J.K. Rowling, is nothing short of a miraculous mythos, the product of great imagination and love for her children expressed beautifully and with great care.  Without great imagination, fostered by a meaningful life experience and an unhindered freedom of expression, the book could never have been written.  Without the talent, discipline, and the ability of the writer to start and finish a project, the book could never have been written.  I believe that without love, the love the writer had for her children, the book could never have been written.  Though I am a huge fan of the Harry Potter mythos, I am really a bigger fan of the love and the beauty of the expression of that love.</p>
<p>The mythos I choose for myself, and aspire to live by, is the Holy Bible.  The quote that mirrors the inspirational quote from the Potter book goes, &#8220;Thus saith the LORD, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches: 9:24 But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the LORD which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the LORD.&#8221;  The Holy Bible has God, and that, rather than magic is what I need to help me make better choices.</p>
<p>I want love to lead me and guide me and comfort me and provide for me.  It&#8217;s about good triumphing over evil.  It&#8217;s about the solution triumphing over the problem.  I want to be a part of the solution.  I want to be a part of the love.  Have I made choices that bring me closer to that goal, or have I let my abilities take me away from it?</p>
<p>I need Love, and God, who had the imagination, the words to say, and the love for us children, spoke the words and created a whole world for us out of darkness.  Regardless of anything that may have happened since that day, today, I get to love and be loved and witness the beauty and love of others, even those, and perhaps, especially those that don&#8217;t rigidly adhere to the same or similar beliefs as my own.  The human talent that can be found to inspire is amazing.  The beauty of human expression can be the most comforting salve for a troubled soul.  But the love, like the divine love for a child by a parent that is not afraid of what that child might do with it, is awesome.  It is the love of God that sustains me and now I wonder if the choices I have made in my life show what I truly am.</p>
<p>I kinda have to wonder that because even though I have chosen the way of love, I have struggled quite a bit.  In my experience, I have seen a whole lot of love expressed in inappropriate ways.  I have seen, masquerading as love, physical abuse, by parents directed at their kids, by husbands directed at their wives, by lovers directed at their loved ones.  I have seen, masquerading as love, sarcasm, snide remarks, yelling, and all manner of verbal abuse, coercions, and manipulation.  I have, myself, abused the people I love the most and treated with greater kindness the clerk at the gas station, putting their feelings on a higher plateau than those of a loved one with a plan to do something that does not fit my schedule or my expectations of them.  I have stood, rooted in place, unable to let love take me out of my routine, my comfort zone, and watched a loved one leave me there alone.  I have seen and participated in so many inappropriate expressions of love and so many crimes against love that I have to wonder if the choices I have made are bringing me closer to love or pushing it farther away.</p>
<p>While I know it when I see it, Love has been an astonishingly difficult thing to master or control, and divine love, that super amazing kind of love that transcends, has been mostly over my head.  Hate, on the other hand, when its not merely an expression of pain that one cannot get over, is surprisingly, the easiest way of dealing with anything one does not understand.  I have done a pretty fair job of choosing love merely by choosing not to hate.  In fact, since hate is such a demanding resource hog, I have found great value, in time and resources, in not doing a thing, as opposed to doing a thing that while it may be the easiest thing in the world to do, costs so much.  Love, which requires a fair amount of listening and not talking; another thing to not do, utilizes for its successful consummation, the sharing of resources between individuals and when successfully executed, generates wonderful results that usually extend far beyond the scope of the casual observer, hence there can be little control or mastery over the results.</p>
<p>I said to God long ago, &#8220;God, love is a thing I have pretty much given up on for myself, but I still want to know more about it.  So here&#8217;s the deal, how about you show me how to love others and then maybe I could hold it, for a time, before passing it on to someone else and maybe, while I&#8217;m holding it, I can learn a thing or two about it.&#8221;  Since that time, I have had some love to give and while I was holding it, I have stolen glimpses of it and I have learned a thing or two about it.  One thing I have learned is that it can&#8217;t be molded into something it is not, nor can it be redefined or altered in any way.</p>
<p>I didn&#8217;t choose the way of love first.  Like many people, it was just easier to let whatever I was good at take me wherever it wanted me to go, and I chose to let my abilities define me.  For a while, I was a pretty fair liar and a thief, but then my life got too complicated and there were severe limitations imposed on me.  I became a pretty fair student, but then life got too complicated and limitations were imposed, thwarting any further academic achievements.  I was never any kind of a ladies man, a charmer, or an athlete, and a severe lack of funds kept me from being much of a consumer.  It was while I was slowly becoming a self-taught computer expert that I became intrigued with God and, ultimately, the way of love.  I&#8217;m not talking about single-parent love, free love, love of country, or family, animals or fellow man.  I&#8217;m talking about divine Love, love that gives with no thought of reward or reciprocation, love that heals, love that creates, love that transcends.</p>
<p>Love simply fails to accomplish transcendence when it is tempered or controlled.  Though actions may be based on love, any attempt I have made to control the way it is expressed or the outcome of its expression has led to a great deal of frustration and, in many cases, a heart wrenching loss of love.  And though I have learned a great deal about love from these experiences, I feel terrible about the way I have treated the people I love and I wish, for myself and those others, that things had went differently, especially when I think of the opportunities that I have missed out on because I tried to limit or control how love was going to be expressed.</p>
<p>Frustration is inevitably the result of trying to limit or control love.  The frustration that I have caused others and experienced myself as a result of someone else, or myself thinking a thing or two about love are many.  Whenever I have tried to control love, or rigidly stood by what I believe is the best way to express my love, I have lost the ones I love, and some of them, I have lost permanently.  The frustrations, confusion, and just plain undesirable results that I have had concerning love, leads me to believe that one cannot just have love, that one needs to understand what love is if they are looking for that special, transcendent, divine love.</p>
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		<title>Todd : Doggone Liberals Anyway</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/07/11/todd-doggone-liberals-anyway/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/07/11/todd-doggone-liberals-anyway/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 11 Jul 2009 05:11:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conservatives]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[debate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dogs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[government]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[liberals]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Just what in the heck is a liberal? The liberal we see is one with an agenda. These popular liberals are crying out that the government is not looking out for the needs of their special interests and that until these special needs are met, the government will not be the one they want. Unfortunately, [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=105&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Just what in the heck is a liberal?</p>
<p>The liberal we see is one with an agenda.  These popular liberals are crying out that the government is not looking out for the needs of their special interests and that until these special needs are met, the government will not be the one they want.  Unfortunately, many of these special needs lie outside the scope of government.  Gay people who want their domestic partnership to be recognized as a holy union in front of God are seeking to have the government make this so.  Gay people, it seems to me, are going to have to look towards the church to get that one worked out, and I&#8217;m not even all that smart.  Racism is a problem by and for individuals and small communities where hate is allowed to be manifest into aggression and is, now that the fourteenth amendment hangs, no longer within the scope of government.  Abortion is only a federal issue as long as the feds aren&#8217;t willing to let each state decide for themselves whether it&#8217;s going to be an issue, so abortion is also outside of the scope of government.  Each of these liberal agenda items are luxury problems that are sadly stealing, along with the spotlight, buttloads of cash that could be funneled into local efforts to make sure our kids are getting fed.</p>
<p>The popular conservative shares the stage with the popular liberal balancing the scales of something and making sure that both ears are full of the stereophonic wailing of both points of view and isn&#8217;t that fun and exciting for us.  Conservatives, naturally alarmed at the demands made by the popular liberals, and knowing that government has no business in certain affairs, like advocating for homosexuals in religious matters, say it can&#8217;t be the way they, popular liberals, want it.  Quiet conservatives would rather try to get along with the government we have.  Loud conservatives enjoy having a viewpoint they believe is grounded in fact and relish every opportunity to point out the ridiculous nature of popular liberal concerns.  That, and the fact that the Jerry Springer Show and professional wrestling are popular programs watched by more than a handful of Americans is a clear indication to me that most Americans are vulnerable and need to be protected from aggressive marketing techniques that are creating a new generation of credit slaves and paupers.  Meanwhile, money flies through the air, sailing over the mouths of hungry babies, lining the pockets of whoever has the most eloquent counterpoint, or the most aggressive, sweaty, beefy muscles packed into stretchy pants.</p>
<p>According to experts, a dog needs exercise, discipline, by way of rules, boundaries and limitations, and affection, each in the order they are presented, to be balanced and happy.  A humanized dog is an unhappy and neurotic creature filled with bad behaviors.  In the wild, a dog&#8217;s vary survival depends on a strong, stable, organized pack, where every member knows its place and follows the rules established by the pack leader.  Failure to provide strong, stable pack leadership will often result in a dog developing erratic behaviors such as anxiety, fear, and phobias, aggression, pulling on the leash, jumping up or other behaviors leading to disobedience and destructive behavior.  Does that sound like a Jerry Springer audience, or what?  Just because so many Americans act like humanized dogs, that does not mean we need strong, stable pack leadership.  </p>
<p>We, as people, need to be treated like people, and to make a person better than they were, they need to be loved, not exploited.  Most popular liberal and conservative causes are fueled by young people empowered with a voice, usually upon entering college, the workforce, parenthood, or military service.  With their new responsibility comes an awareness of their place in the world.  May I point out that most of these young people are still partying like when they were kids, still trying hard to get noticed by love interests, and still trying to avoid being like their parents.  In this volatile and often frenzied state, young people are a prey to older members of society looking to take advantage of fresh new resources to further their cause.  Exploitation is not love and it makes a sucking sound.  Right now, the only place an American can get a break from being exploited is in failure, or the psyche ward.</p>
<p>It is my estimation, looking through the bluff and the fluster, that a true liberal is nothing like the raving lunatics who make the claim that they are liberals.  I believe a true liberal is one who believes the government should be in place to make sure no child goes to bed hungry, that no man or woman willing and able to learn should be barred from the countries finest universities, and that no man or woman willing and able to work should be competing with hundreds of other applicants for a job.  This true liberal wants a government that will bailout veterans instead of banks, that will offer to protect its citizens from crooked creditors and commercial college pitchmen instead of offering protection to automakers and investment bankers that consciously choose to ignore good business acumens.  The true liberal is the one who thinks that every citizen has as much a right to protection from the government as protection by the government and that every citizen deserves to be served well by the government they have empowered.</p>
<p>It is not my wish to end the debates.  I&#8217;m not sure, but I think healthy debate is one of the cornerstones of a great society.  It makes me sad when I see people I love being sucked on and exploited, but I have no desire to &#8220;straighten them out&#8221;.  Man has been trying to straighten people out since the beginning of time and the failure has been utter and consistent.  This commentary is only meant to be a treatment, an expression of how I&#8217;m feeling about stuff today.</p>
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		<title>Todd : The Free Pass #2</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/06/29/todd-the-free-pass-2/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/06/29/todd-the-free-pass-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 29 Jun 2009 03:39:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cute girls]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intelligence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[talent]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wealth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wisdom]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/?p=90</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This free pass would be intended for really cute girls, especially for really cute girls that aren&#8217;t wise, smart, talented, or wealthy. Really cute girls are a joy to have around, and just a smile from a really cute girl can make my day, and I&#8217;ll remember that smile the whole day through. I can [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=90&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This free pass would be intended for really cute girls, especially for really cute girls that aren&#8217;t wise, smart, talented, or wealthy.  </p>
<p>Really cute girls are a joy to have around, and just a smile from a really cute girl can make my day, and I&#8217;ll remember that smile the whole day through.  I can but assume that the same goes for most men, and most men, if they can keep from objectifying her, will favor a really cute girl, listening more intently to what she has to say, going the extra mile to help her out of a jam, bending over backwards to make sure she is happy with her new cable service, and generally making sure that she has a meaningful time with them.  Though everybody should expect this kind of service from people in the service industry, really cute girls are always sure to get it from regular guys.</p>
<p>The good thing about this is regular guys have a real opportunity, when a really cute girl comes along, to do something amazing, something they would never do under ordinary circumstances, so in that way, really cute girls can inspire greatness where there used to be no greatness at all.  How many heads have been lopped off and delivered in a blood-stained charger because a fetching lass demanded it at a birthday party?  How many wars have been fought?  How many great love songs have been written, or played anyways, since it seems like many love songs were written by boys about boys.  But how many amazing things have been done for the sake, the favor, or the smile, of a really cute girl?</p>
<p>The sad thing about it is really cute girls, if they don&#8217;t have the wisdom, the intellect, the talent, or the money to get the things they want, may choose to cash in their really cute-ness to acquire things they could get if they only apply themselves.  The worst one can expect out of this scenario is prostitution, the result of which is, at best, low self worth, no ambition, a twisted reorganization of priorities and a perverse definition of the word love.  Really cute girls must wrestle everyday, whether they realize it, or not, with the decision to use their charms to smooth the way to their goals, or not.</p>
<p><img src="http://toddadavis.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/freepass02front.gif?w=450" /><br />
THE FLIP SIDE<br />
<img src="http://toddadavis.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/freepass02back.gif?w=450" /></p>
<p>The nice thing about this free pass is it gives a girl a break from all the pressure in the media, media which is provided free of charge to even the most poverty stricken, via public television, radio and print, to use their feminine wiles to secure the things a girl wants.  Most really cute girls, if they&#8217;re not wise, smart, talented, or wealthy, end up spending much of their time being really cute and figuring out, often times the hard way, how best to apply their cuteness to get the things they want.  This free pass could allow the bearer to have a real experience in the real world, a world that isn&#8217;t skewed or influenced by a marketing strategy that has sold billions of dollars worth of stuff to a market that has never really needed it.  And then, when they&#8217;ve had that experience, they can go back to being really cute.  If however, the bearer struggles everyday with being really cute, this free pass would allow the bearer to have a real experience in the real world without having to be indoctrinated into a political agenda, an agenda that is usually only available to wealthy college students who don&#8217;t have to focus their energy on more practical studies, like what they can learn to put food on the table. </p>
<p>As a girl grows, she becomes wise, but often that wisdom comes a little too late, especially to a poor girl to be of much use, and often comes after her innocence is already lost.  An intelligent girl is often distracted by the myriad of things she has yet to learn and her innocence can often be preserved as she puts off the attainment of things she wants while she still has things to learn.  A wealthy girl can many times defer the use of her wiles as long as she has money she can use to get what she wants.  A talented girl can become so engrossed in developing her craft, that her innocence may be preserved quite a long time before it is called upon the auction block.    The strategic use of this free pass could buy any really cute girl some precious time which could prove a priceless investment in her future, and more importantly, in her definition of the word love.</p>
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		<title>Todd : Neda broke my heart too</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/06/24/todd-neda-broke-my-heart/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/06/24/todd-neda-broke-my-heart/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Jun 2009 05:27:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[freedom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[growing pains]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Iran]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neda]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[protest]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[white lightning]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/?p=78</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[What is going on in Iran is terrible and heart-breaking, and I&#8217;m not saying that because Obama said it. I said it yesterday when I first tried to write this blog. Then I turned to the wiki to figure out what the heck it was I was going to say as I tried to sort [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=78&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>What is going on in Iran is terrible and heart-breaking, and I&#8217;m not saying that because Obama said it.  I said it yesterday when I first tried to write this blog.  Then I turned to the wiki to figure out what the heck it was I was going to say as I tried to sort out my hurt feelings.  The wiki buried me in data about democracy and I was stunned by it all and that&#8217;s what I needed, to not feel anything, so thanks wiki.  Today, I&#8217;m not even going to the wiki, but I&#8217;m going to try and sort out my feelings write hear and now.</p>
<p>Wikipedia has a ton of really good information on democracy, tracing the history of the many varieties of democracy through time.  I would recommend anyone who has a broken heart about what&#8217;s going on in Iran to go ahead and read that stuff.  Having read some of that stuff, I can say that I don&#8217;t really care to comment on democracy.  </p>
<p>Iran is a country that for some reason, decided to have a presidential election.  Iranians do not have the right to free speech, or expression, but Iran decided to have a presidential election.  This does not make sense.  What else does not make sense is while the candidates were campaigning, Iranians got excited about their favorite candidate.  There they were, idealistic college kids talking smilingly about their favorite candidate, the one who was going to challenge the incumbent and make everything all better.  These kids were not at all as dumb as I just made them sound.  They were smart, passionate, and very intellectual, which makes the fact that they seemed to be taking this election seriously all the more strange.</p>
<p>So then the Iranians, in Iran&#8217;s presidential election, went out and voted for their favorite candidates.  Actually that one does make sense.  It sounds like something my mom would do, and the act of voting in an Iranian election accomplishes two things.  First, by voting, you can feel certain that you did all that you could to stand up for what you believe in.  Second, by voting, you constructively put forth an effort to demonstrate your desire for the thing you want and add to the pool of energy that wants the same thing.  It sounds like the two are the same, but they are not.  You can do the first without the second, but you can&#8217;t do the second, without the first.</p>
<p>So they voted and when the votes were counted, accurately, or inaccurately doesn&#8217;t matter in a country where the citizens have no rights, and then they got upset.  They hit the streets, just like the hippies in the fifties and sixties, protesting for civil rights, or like in the sixties and seventies, protesting the Vietnam Conflict, or whatever they want to call it nowadays.  Watch the movie White Lightning, one of the best movies ever, and see a film that deals with moonshine, the Vietnam War protesters, shaky pudding, and a community that don&#8217;t take too kindly to a bunch of uppity hippies protesting in their streets.  It is an awesome flick and if you scene it, then maybe, you would have a better understanding of those Iranians out in the streets of Iran.  They are fighting the good fight for their children.</p>
<p>I saw the video of Neda and my heart broke, and I praised her for fighting the good fight for other people&#8217;s children, since she&#8217;s dead, and I cheered for the unrest over there, but I also feared for them and hoped that a minimum of casualties would be the price for freedom.  I also hoped that the United States would recognize, and make the correlations between our own growing pains and theirs and offer some words of encouragement to both sides.   Some thing like, &#8220;Well, we had something like this in the fifties and sixties with the civil rights movement and a lot of children died.  We, over here, in the United States, hope that fewer of your children will die as your country grows from this.&#8221;  A get-well card like that from us would be a pretty cool thing because it would acknowledge that we&#8217;re paying attention to what&#8217;s going and we&#8217;re sympathetic, being grown up about it and trying to be understanding rather than accusatory and lame.  Our going into our streets crying about Iran is counterproductive if the people in Iran are already doing it.  We should applaud them as they go through the very necessary process of growth and enlightenment, or whatever, and remember our own who died to show us the way in our time.</p>
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		<title>Todd : Demographics</title>
		<link>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/06/22/todd-demographics/</link>
		<comments>http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/2009/06/22/todd-demographics/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 22 Jun 2009 03:24:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>toddadavis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[American]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bow-staff skills]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[captains]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[demographics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lobster]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[playground]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tank]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://toddadavis.wordpress.com/?p=74</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If a person is like a lobster in a tank, then that person is hanging out waiting around for a patron to come and pick them, but more like a kid on the playground hoping to be picked for a team, not caring which team, just hoping to be picked as soon as possible because [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=toddadavis.wordpress.com&amp;blog=7391283&amp;post=74&amp;subd=toddadavis&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>If a person is like a lobster in a tank, then that person is hanging out waiting around for a patron to come and pick them, but more like a kid on the playground hoping to be picked for a team, not caring which team, just hoping to be picked as soon as possible because everyone wants to be desired, and to play and besides, they&#8217;re full of sugar.  Some of those kids, like the husky one with the shiny shoes, are very popular, so they&#8217;d probably make good team captains.  In America, everyone who is not home-schooled is like the aforementioned lobster and they all attend lobster school to learn how to be better lobsters than all the rest.  Once they turn eighteen, they enter into the exciting lobster tanks according to demographics.  The largest demographic is the eighteen to thirty-five demographic.  Starting with the general eighteen to thirty-five demographic, Americans can be sorted into tighter demographics which will allow them to be more specifically targeted by more specific marketing strategies.  Once the sorting is complete, the hunt begins.  Americans are hunted, targeted, trapped, hooked, fleeced, tagged and released back into the wild everyday by corporations, and federal, state and local government.</p>
<p>Lobsters hang out in the tank and people who want lobster will look in the tank and choose lobsters based on whatever personal feelings they have about what makes a tasty lobster.  Surprisingly, unlike Americans in the demographic tank, we don&#8217;t see lobsters in tanks sporting tattoos or NFL team logos, or any of the product brand recognition crap used to make Americans more attractive, and lobsters aren&#8217;t being injected with hormones, salt water, or any other additives to make them more desirable or profitable.  All a lobster basically needs to be is red, and big and people pick the reddest and the biggest.  You might think that Americans need to fall into a much more complex set of parametrics to be considered prime pickings from the demographic tank, but all they need to have is money.  As long as an American has money, that American is plenty desirable and the patrons will do whatever they can to get some of that money.  Once the American is picked and some of its money is taken away, then the American is thrown back in so it can make a little more money.</p>
<p>While we hang out in the tank, we try to make ourselves more desirable by buying whatever can make us more good-looking, smarter, more charismatic, cooler, more powerful, richer, and more famous.  And as long as we have enough energy, luck, ambition, rhythm, passion, brain power, discipline, bow-staff skills, and talent, we will be able to reach our goals, and we will become more desirable to others around us, and we will make more money, which will make us more desirable to our patrons.  If we can continue along this line until we reach the end of our demographic, then we can go ahead and be retired, and then, maybe, we can find out what&#8217;s really important in life, or not.</p>
<p>I wish it wasn&#8217;t true, but lots of people have lots of hang-ups about being desirable, and while they concentrate their efforts to these ends, feelings are hurt, precious relationships are crushed, and people are alienated, left in the dust of a loved ones chase for whatever they believe will make themselves more desirable.  Failing to appreciate how much they are desired or, heaven forbid, deciding they are not being desired by the right people, they leave their loved ones behind as they pursue whatever will make them feel more desirable.  They get to where they&#8217;re going; only they&#8217;re not all there.  If they&#8217;re lucky, they get the thing that makes them more desirable and they can go ahead and be more desirable.  If not, they realize they got a hole in their heart.  If they can find something that will fill the hole their loved ones used to fill, they seize on it, trying to shape it and make it fill that hole.  Hopefully, this works and they can go ahead and be more desirable.  </p>
<p>Everybody wants to be desirable.  I might be wrong and I wonder if anyone can help but apply to others what they tend to believe about themselves, but I want to be desirable.  I wanted to be good looking, smart, charismatic, cool, powerful, rich and famous, but I was never endowed with any of those characteristics, and I never figured out how to make any of those things happen for me on a shoe string budget.  It&#8217;s not like all I needed was more money, I also needed to have a lot more energy, luck, ambition, rhythm, passion, brain power, discipline, bow-staff skills, and talent.  As I advanced through the stages of grief, I came to realize that all those things are not what life is really about.</p>
<p>Obviously, plenty of people do have an abundance of many of the aforementioned gifts, but such gifts may be as much of a hindrance to what life is really about, at the same time as they make the process of living, standing upright and taking nourishment, easier and more enjoyable.  The poor little rich kid had a lot of stuff, but that stuff owned him as much as he owned it.  He wouldn&#8217;t let it go, but I happen to believe that he could have let it go just fine and if he did, he might have been shocked to find that it would not let him go.  He might even have had to fight to make it stay gone.</p>
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